Part II

When I was blogging last night, I felt the need to get up in front of the church to tell them about how everything happened, about putting God first, not the desire to have a baby. Bro Tony got up and said that when he stood up last night during the invitation and was speaking to the congregation about whoever needed to come down, he said he looked at me and knew it was me. He said that when I finally came down and was with our pastor, he said in his mind he saw me and Eric up front holding our baby for the baby dedication. When I called my mama to tell her about this, she asked me why I thought he didn't tell me this last night. I believe there is a reason, it needed to be public. My church family needed to hear this. It would not have the same affect if I told them this is what he said, they needed to hear it for themselves. That is why I felt that desire to tell them about me changing my priorities. I told y'all that Sue said my face popped into her mind when she was praying, but she also said that earlier she had prayed that whatever is keeping us from having a baby, that it be taken away. My prayer has been that our having a child would bring glory to God. I want is to be seen without a doubt. Y'all need to stay tuned, cause I have a feeling this is about to get interesting....

Delight yourself in the Lord

I know some of you may think I have dropped off the face of the earth. It has been a while since I have had a post. To update you on my mom, she is doing good. She will not have to have treatments. What a blessing.
We are having our revival this weekend. Tonight during the invitation I went to the alter to pray. I was praying for God to make a change in my life. I told Him I want to make Him number 1 in my life. For so long, having a baby has been number 1 in my life. I told God that I wanted to make Him first, even if that meant not ever having children. I went back to my seat and the invitation went on. We had our closing prayer, and when the preacher went to the back of the church, a man told him he had something to say. He got up there and said he felt there was someone there who was lost and needed to get their life right with God. Bro. Tony spoke and said he was feeling the same thing, but the fact that that man came forward only confirmed his feelings. We sang a couple of verses of Just as I Am, and nobody came forward. They were about to close again, and one of our deacons came forward and said he really felt there was someone who needed to get right with God. He asked that we sing another verse. After two more verses, the person finally came forward, it was me! I had been standing back there fighting saying it isn't me, they aren't talking about me. I kept praying, God, if it is me, let me know. I can't explain it. I just felt like I was being pushed, and my heart was about to beat out of my chest. I have heard of others say they had been in church all of their lives, and they thought they were saved, but later in life they realized they weren't. Well, I am now one of those people. I thought I was saved, but the last several years, I have been putting wanting a child first in my life. After I prayed for God to be number one, even if it meant not having children, I was finally able to open my heart. After the service Sue came up to me to tell me that she was praying for whoever needed to come forward and my face popped into her mind. She said she just gasped when she looked up and I had come forward. The last two nights Bro. Tony has said, delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. I realized tonight that I had let the desires of my heart keep me from delighting myself in the Lord.